Relationships like any living being need tending to. There are highs and lows and extreme challenges. So how does one know when he/she is in the right relationship? If we pay enough attention, we know whether our relationship is a normal healthy one, or is just purely toxic. A toxic relationship or marriage affects a person’s whole physical, mental and spiritual being. Apart from heart diseases etc., it breaks you piece by piece and in the whole process you end up losing your whole identity.
But why wait till you are absolutely reduced to a shell. If you can catch the signs of a toxic relationship early, it will help you heal and move ahead in life, giving you better opportunities to grow.
Signs that you are in a toxic relationship
# 1 Passive-aggressive behaviour
Some people give silent treatment instead of solving issues. Or every time you ask them, what’s wrong, they may respond saying, nothing. That’s a classic example of passive aggressive behavior. This stops any form of further communication. And the relationship is devoid of any room for resolution of conflict.
Another stereotypical passive-aggressive behaviour is ‘gaslighting’. It means your partner would call you completely crazy for bringing issues up, even though you know in your gut that something is wrong.
# 2 Volatility
Relationships that have the variance of extremely fluctuating moods have a high likelihood of being toxic.
# 3“Jokes” or “snide comments”
At times your partner makes jokes at your expense, which instead of tickling your funny bone, makes you cringe, feel small, and unworthy. When someone tries to reduce you to nothing, it is time to let that person go.
# 4 Walking on eggshells
Relationships are not supposed to be like eggshells. There should be trust and open communication in any relationship. If you stop doing what your heart wants just because your partner might get angry is proof that you are in an extremely toxic relationship.
# 5 Permission for every small thing
In any relationship, there are two mature adults who shouldn’t have to ask for permission for every small thing. Unlike the important decisions, you don’t need “permission” for simpler things, like wanting to meet your friends or going to your parent’s house to visit. When you start avoiding things that make you happy just to avoid conflicts it means you are in a toxic relationship, that is definitely not healthy for you in any way, even though it does stroke your partner’s ego.
# 6 Constant exhaustion
Trying to keep up with your partner’s moods, or acting according to it can be absolutely exhausting. A toxic relationship is extremely exhausting. Conflicts take more time to resolve and start happening frequently. This tires you, both mentally and emotionally.
# 7 Becoming isolated
Being constantly exhausted demotivates you from seeing your friends or family, and slowly you become completely isolated. You are too exhausted to have that conflict that follows, so you decide you are better off without that conflict.
It is pertinent to respect yourself and ensure that no one has the ability to diminish you to nothing. If you have noticed these alarming signs in your relationship, please get up and get out of this toxic relationship while you can.
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